Napoleon (3,000 Measly Dollars)

from The Villain is Right! by Andrew Delaney

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lyrics

“Napoleon (3,000 Measly Dollars)”

I believe it's time
I tell you that I love you
Though my frazzled nerves
They have failed me in the past
And subtlety, well
It ain't working like I want it to
But I could make another stupid joke
Yeah, let's go with that

And our friends are content
To drop hints and stand around laughing
And truth is, well
You probably already know the truth
But I believe they've got a betting pool
On if it's ever gonna happen
So maybe you ain't feelin me
Or you just want Steve to lose

Take that Steve

When Napoleon died
Some doctor cut him up and harvested his organs (it's true)
Gave his heart and other parts to a Corsican priest
I guess for safe keeping
Oh don't make that face at me
You asked what I was reading

Now there's this poem I admire
It's called “Tactics & Strategy”
And I've liked it a long, long time
But never shared it with anyone
And I mean no disrespect
To Mario Benedetti
It's just that last line never set right with me
So I'm trying to write my own

Well Napoleon's mummified penis was sold at an auction to a urologist in New Jersey
And given what it was you'd have thought it'd bring in a little bit more money
This world has never made much sense to me
I don't suppose it'll start now

But I believe it's time
I tell you that I love you
I believe it's time

credits

from The Villain is Right!, released February 19, 2021

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Andrew Delaney Dallas, Texas

Postmodern anti-folk or something.

"The Alfred Hitchcock of singer / songwriters." Rich Warren - WFMT Radio, Chicago.

AndrewDelaneyMusic.com

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